Death Race 3 – Inferno (critique and analysis)
by subacati
Direct To Video means low budget, minimal plot and no real storyline. I get that, I really do, but does it need to be as bad as this? …
Warning – This review contains spoilers.
Okay, so here I received a copy of this Direct To Video low budget film. It's set in South Africa and film entirely on location, and partly in the location! :p
( :sst: That's a South African joke. If you're not South African, laugh anyway before someone notices! :whistle: )
Much of the film transpires in or around a rather poorly constructed prison that is supposedly in the middle of the Kalahari dessert! Of course, the location used for the prison is an old abandoned quarry cut into a mountain surrounded by a forrest of trees! So it's nowhere near the real Kalahari! π
The prison is first introduced by the lead villain as, "The Kalahari Desert Maximum Security Penitentiary."
Now we have never used the term "penitentiary" in South Africa and I doubt we ever will! :left:
We have two C-Max Prisons in South Africa, One in Tswane (Pretoria) and one in Kokstad. All the other prisons are Medium prisons. (Medium prisons are internally sub-divided into medium (short sentence) and maximum (long sentence) sections and prisons)
We also have two privately owned prisons that house only long term maximum prisoners. One in Louie Trichardt and the other in Bloemfontein.
Of course, this is irrelevant to the movie which blatantly ignores reality, and the South African Constitution, in the name of shameless and gratuitously graphic 'entertainment'.
So, fast-forward to the arrival of the prisoners, contestants in the death races, in South Africa. Where they are transported from Cape Town to the Kalahari prison in the back of an unmarked Casspir. I doubt that Casspirs have ever been used to transport prisoners as they lock from the inside! :p
The prisoners are shown to be shackled with some kind of hybrid between handcuffs and chains. This type of handcuff is not used in South Africa, and I doubt it would be used anywhere as it would provide a handy weapon when wrapped around a guard's neck! π
The entrance to the Kalahari Prison appears to be in the side of Table Mountain which is surprising on two accounts. The Kalahari is flat like a pancake and nowhere near Table Mountain! :p
Of course, this first introduction to the entrance of the prison lacks continuity with later scenes, where the entrance shown is clearly of a different location. π
Cut to the scene within the tunnel where prisoners, mostly white males, are seen to be doing some sort of manual labour. (mining?) This certainly is no modern prison where prisoners have rights and slave labour is illegal. The inmates are guarded by what appears to be military personnel in camo and maroon berets. (the insignia bears the letters 'KMSP' which has no identifiable meaning to me)
The logo resembles the SAPS 'shield' which can be seen on there official home page. (link:http://www.saps.gov.za/) Except that the decal in the centre has been replaced with what looks suspiciously similar to a map of Texas! π
Now, some of these details would have passed unnoticed except that glaring irregularities caused me to take a critical second look! :p A case in point, a perimeter guard is shown with a hyena on a leash. Hyenas are scavengers and, though they will hunt as a pack when hungry enough, tend to be cowards on their own. A hyena would not be a good alternative to the more traditional alsatian!
An interesting scene is where the prisoners are being led to their cages. They're led past a series of giant 'hamster wheels' where prisoners wearing dust masks are being used as human engines! While I can't figure out what the function is meant to be, this is really a weird form of slave labour that is far more fitting in a remake of Spartacus than a 'near future' action movie!
The prisoners are housed in safety cages similar to the type found surrounding industrial equipment. Real prisons have proper roundbar grill doors as well as solid doors. And in South Africa, we have communal cells, not individual rooms.
So, lets fast forward to the gladiator scene where a bunch of scantily clad, beautiful women chop each others heads off. Yes, gratuitous as it comes. This scene is clearly intended to appeal to a very narrow minded, juvenile, male audience. π
(note: The women are constantly referred to as 'navigators' yet they never do anything useful throughout the movie)
So, lets jump forward to the start of the race. We begin at the entrance of the prison, which bares a striking resemblance to the Cheyenne Mountain Nuclear Bunker's North Portal. This is clearly inside a disused quarry that's surrounded by trees. Remember, this is meant to be in the middle of the Kalahari desert where the only trees you'll find are thorn trees and even those are few and far between! The first leg of the race takes the drivers to, "the sand dunes of Katbakkies Pass". Of course, in reality Katbakkies is in the Breede River valley and there are no sand dunes anywhere near there!
From there we jump to Kayelitsha in Cape Town, which the voice over commentator pronounces as "kerleesha". Note that the satellite display gives the coordinates for Kayelitsha as 44Β°32'28.05"N 27Β°54'19.22"E, which is a road in Romania. Couldn't they just spend five second on Google to get the real coordinates? (34Β°02β²25β³S 18Β°40β²40β³E)
One interesting scene has a clear shot of a sign board which, with the help of Google street view, allows us to pin-point the exact location of the scene.
Shortly after this, the driver are suddenly magically transported to 'Stilfontein', except that the scene is clearly in the bundu somewhere and the only Stilfontein I know of is a built-up area near Klerksdorp. :p
A reference is made to the fictitious "Warlords of the Kalahari" being responsible for 75% of organised crime in the region. The truth is that our criminal syndicates prefer to base themselves in the cities and surrounding townships! There aren't many people to murder, rape and rob out in the middle of the bundu! π
And then were suddenly back at the old quarry,, eh sorry, the "Kalahari Prison" :p Having travelled at least 500km. Note that the earlier scene in Cape Town shows shadows that place the time at around the mid afternoon. Assuming that the prison is meant to be located in the middle of the Kalahari and not right on the outskirts of Cape Town, it should be well after dark by the time they reach it. And if they actually were to travel as far as Stilfontein from that spot, they could never have made it to Stillfontein before well into the night anyway! π
Another issue with the "Kalahari Prison" is the size of the cockroaches. The Kalahari is a desert and it's too cold and dry there for cockroaches. In fact, cockroaches throughout the Western Cape seldom manage as much as a centimetre in length. The species of cockroach is also a mistake as that speceies is rare in most of South Africa. They're usually found in MoΓ§ambique an Madagascar.
The next leg of the race takes us to the Keiskie mountains in Northern Cape. This is near Calvinia. The satellite view in the movie again shows the wrong coordinates. (44Β°32'30"N 27Β°55'39"E instead of 31Β°37'51"S 19Β°51'14"E)
Of course, it is impossible to match up the fake satellite view from to movie to any real life features! π¦
Then, after a short battle in 'the dry lake', we head into Calvinia. The map in their Satellite view shows the new location not more than 100m away yet Calvinia is actually about 10km north of the Keiskie mountains. And the compass on the movie's satellite view shows the drivers travelling west. :left:
The voice over commentator calls the place "Calveena" instead of Calvinia. I think he may need spectacles if he can't even read the easy names correctly! :p
At this point I suspect that a South African was helping write the script. We see a stereotyped South African protest march against the Death Race competitors. This deteriorates rapidly into a violent conflict. (or starts out as one, depending on your interpretation)
BTW, is it just me or is it beyond far-fetched that, regardless of what kind of lawless anarchy would allow a tv show to exploit prisoners as gladiators, the race allows dangerous prisoners serving life sentences to drive weapon laden vehicles through heavily populated areas? :confused:
I quite liked the derogatory Afrikaans slogans on the protesters' sign boards though! :p There is some perverse satisfaction in knowing that most non South Africans that watched this movie could never quite appreciate the intensity of the insulting language! :p Muahaha! :devil:
The next town mentioned is Loeriesfontein. The commentator pronounces this as "louise von-tyne" which is either his ex-wife's name or he forgot to wear his spectacles again! :whistle:
And then we're back at the headquarters of "The Warlords of the Kalahari" again. If you remember, The last time we we in this same spot we were somewhere near Stilfontein. Now we're somewhere near Loeriesfontein.
Loeriesfontein is about 100km north of Calvinia. Stilfontein is about 500km ENE of Calvinia as the crow flies, but somewhat further if you intend using roads to get there.
The final stage of the race opens up to the sound of kwaito type rapp music. And suddenly we're at Redrock Road. (Table Mountain) About 400km south of where we were the previous day. (wow, I wish I had a car that could jump around the map like that!) Then, they enter The Quarry. No tell-tale names this time to tell us where this quarry is. π¦
With that they arrive back at the prison and the 'good' guy takes out the 'bad' guy.
The main character survives a fiery explosion that destroys the prison entrance. Then, when he recovers, he claims to not be 'Frankenstein'. Cut to a scene out on the waterfront where the team is free and enjoying life. (including one guy that died earlier in the movie)
The movie concludes with a montage of 'missing' scenes that explain much of the movie.
Well, now that you've read this, you don't need to watch the movie! :p
But honestly, would you have wanted to watch this mess anyway? π
A few final notes;No part of this film was filmed in the Kalahari. Every location mentioned is considerably south of the Kalahari.Please Hollywood, if you're going to make a film set in the Kalahari, at least use the names of places that are part of the Kalahari in your scripts!In fact, only a tiny fraction of the southern most part of the Kalahari is even in South Africa to begin with! The rest is mostly Namibia and Botswana! :p
Guess I'll be giving this one a miss :)Do you get sick of the rest of Africa being passed off as RSA, for Cinematic purposes of one kind or another? I know (or think I know) that District 9 was filmed in Soweto, Jo'Burg…but that's probably an exception, right? :)And D9 also has the Casspir. That looks like fun to drive :up: (but has it got aircon?)
Originally posted by FlaRin:
It's a steel can on wheels! :pOriginally posted by FlaRin:
It's usually the other way around. Hollywood directors are kinda nervous about most of Africa, so they come film in South Africa rather than go to Nigeria or Ethiopia etc. :pWhat bugs me the most is when the script suggests something impossible, like travelling from Jo'burg to Cape Town and back again, all in the same day! :irked:And it's time that Hollywood directors realised that, in the twenty-first century, everyone's online and will be googling the things depicted in the movie before the scene is finished! The least they should do is make sure the script gells with Wikipedia and Google's first page results! :p
These vehicles look like from Mad Max π
when the second flick came out it made me vomit in my mouth from time to time so it would've been a definite no for me on the third.But from a South African's point of view your review actually makes me want to go see it to see the flaws of the movie and to point and say, 'yarrrr boet was nogal right hoor!' :p
Originally posted by Cois:
:lol:Yes, there is something about "made in South Africa" that make ya wanna look! Like a bad traffic accident, ya don't wanna see it but ya can't not look! :p
Oh so a film was made in your home country and it wasn't accurate at all in the slightest to real life? Welcome to how Americans feel π Also, not everyone in a dance club here is hot either, sorry to spoil it. :p
Originally posted by spiritcrow:
:lol:Well, at least you don't get movies where they drive through Miami to get to New York from Atlantic City! :pEven your "spring break" movies suggest that it's at least an eventful day's trip from New York to Florida! :whistle:
American movies are piled high with inaccuracies. The amount of American war heroes that were saving the British in operations that happened before America even joined the second world war… :doh:Even American history is not sacred from the movie makers. In the current movie Lincoln they have states voting for slavery who voted against it. And when the relevant Congressman points this out, a guy named Joe Courteney, the film makers say that this adds to the movie! π
So 'snafu' applies then! :p
Originally posted by qlue:
Well, we cannot have that! I have linked to a different site now. I hope CNN doesn't do that kind of thing!
P.S: a word of caution in that the site you linked to seems to have some dodgy javascript in it that may be an attempted 'drive-by' attack! :yikes:
Hmmm! What was the title? can you find it on imdb and pass me a link please?
Is it this one?http://www.unhingedsurvivingjoburg.com/
Mr Scientist – I just watched a doco about Jo'Burg: Mopogo, Bad Boyz and Red Ants…. Jeez – I'm glad I don't live there!
No…this :http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZJ1w9-UmcwThat's pretty heavy stuff :eyes:
I'll watch that when I get a chance. Although I find that British documentaries about South Africa usually need to be taken with a pinch of salt. :pThe BBC is especially good ct making the truth sound a lot more serious than it really is. :whistle:
Originally posted by qlue:
'Tis too true.
Well, it's all South Africans talking, not the BBC – but I'll be interested in your views π
Actually, that was a wonderful and fascinating documentary!And that reporter is either extremely brave or extremely naΓ―ve! :insane:But please bare in mind that he was focusing on a very tiny part of Jo'burg. And the most dangerous part at that! :sherlock:Diepsloot isn't even in Jo'burg, it's closer to Pretoria! (Tswane)And Hillbrow is a notorious suburb in the middle of Jo'burg. Yet Braamfontein, which is right next door, was a quiet and safe neighbourhood last time I was there! (Many years ago, things may have changed quiet a lot since then!)But yes, Jo'burg CBD is not a place for the feint of heart! :pWhere I live now, in Umzinto, everyone bemoans the 'high crime' here and talks about how dangerous it is! I grew up in Germiston, just next door to Jo'burg, and this place is peaceful in comparison! :p
then you better come and visit if you really want peacefull. I swear it's a damn cemetery in comparison. :p
That reporter is quite brave actually, or at least not afraid to tread where other merely google – if you look around you'll find a number of interesting investigationsreports on youtube by him. Louis Theroux – his dad is Paul Theroux, the author, as a matter of interest π
Originally posted by FlaRin:
And if I hadn't heard him speak I'd have guessed he was French! :pOriginally posted by FlaRin:
The old adage, "Fools rush in where Angels fear to tread!" comes to mind!Those security guys aren't easily intimidated. It's not for nothing that they were hesitant to enter that building at night! :pHillbrow has a New Years Eve tradition of throwing Fridges, stoves washing machines and such out of the highest windows onto the streets below. The Police barricade the area and don't allow any vehicles in or out after midday on New Years Eve. No sane person gets within ten city blocks of Hillbrow from around mid December to mid January! :pI'd like to see this guy come and report on that fiasco! :DHowever, the area formally known as the Witwatersrand, which stretches beyond the borders of Gauteng, has many notorious 'hotspots' with some really peaceful neighbourhoods in between! :up:It's much like any other Metropolis in that respect! :yes:
It's too easy to focus on a really tough area and (even unwittingly) give the impression that 'this is what it's all like'. Another similar report on a nice happy suburb might balance it out a bit…
Originally posted by FlaRin:
This is what I meant with my earlier remark about taking a British documentary 'with a pinch of salt.' :yes:The real tragedy of Hillbrow is that it was the upmarket residential area of the Sixties and Seventies and really only started to deteriorate in the Eighties. But it was still a place you could live in at the start of the Nineties. It went down extremely quickly after the elections in 1994, mainly because many property owners up and left the country and abandoned their buildings. This is how the whole building hi-jacking thing started. Without Landlords to claim ownership, it was inevitable that opportunistic syndicates would move in and capitalise on the situation!Now that's I small detail that nearly every documentary on Hillbrow never focuses on. Yet it is an important part of the story if you want to understand what happened to the place! :up:
I know this is a teeny bit random, but I think you might enjoy this one :Louis Theroux does Infomercials… – very entertaining π
Okay, that looks interesting! :up:
you at work or cashing in your night owl chips? :eyes:
I don't sleep so well at night. :pNot at work, but just finished seven nights of night shift, so still sleeping well in the morning! :p
Though only reason I'd watch a film like this would be to get a look at some "interesting" vehicles. Besides the Casspir did anything grab your eye?Originally posted by qlue:
There is a precedent for treadmills in prisons, that is surprisingly recent. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treadmill#Treadmills_for_punishmentThe Wicklow Gaol – now a museum – has a recreation of a treadmill that was used in the 1800s.http://www.independent.ie/regionals/wicklowpeople/news/recreated-treadwheel-an-18th-century-prison-device-torture-exhibit-at-wicklow-gaol-27763427.htmlPicture:http://www.tripadvisor.ie/LocationPhotoDirectLink-g186644-d534404-i32963319-Wicklow_s_Historic_Gaol-County_Wicklow.html
yeah… Let them practice to run…. :whistle:
Or exhaust them until they can barely move.
you still be fit… :left:
Originally posted by Mickeyjoe-Irl:
The vehicles were pretty much standard Mad Max fare!Originally posted by Mickeyjoe-Irl:
π not under the current SA constitution though!
Not that I've read the whole blog post but I've seen that you had some pretty fun time watching this movie. So admit it, you would watch it again just to find some more silliness in it π It's actually normal thing in the movies, it's like that thing that every class in school has one popular rich girl with two friends, one guy everybody is in love with, one nerd, one fat child, one extra smart and good dreamer that will success mostly in the end, one sport lover, etc.But it's still silly how they couldn't put any more effort into getting at least right Earth hemisphere when mentioning coordinates of the place π
Originally posted by gyng:
Exactly! :pAnd the voice-over guy could have at least tried to pronounce the names right! π