Apparently, I’m wanted by the FBI!
by subacati
This is an attachment to a blank Email I received today. :lol:.
Clearly Paul does not know that the Feds don't have jurisdiction outside of the Federation! :p …
THIS IS THE (F.B.I)
FBI HEADQUARTERS IN WASHINGTON, D.C.
FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION
J. EDGAR HOOVER BUILDING
935 PENNSYLVANIA AVENUE,
NW WASHINGTON, D.C. 20535-0001
FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION (FBI)
ATTENTION THIS IS THE FINAL WARNING YOU ARE GOING TO RECIEVE FROM ME DO YOU GET ME????
I HOPE YOUβRE UNDERSTAND HOW MANY TIMES THIS MESSAGE HAS BEEN SENT TO YOU?.
WE HAVE WARNED YOU SO MANY TIME AND YOU HAVE DECIDED TO IGNORE OUR E-MAILS OR BECAUSE YOU BELIEVE WE HAVE NOT BEEN INSTRUCTED TO GET YOU ARRESTED, AND TODAY IF YOU FAIL TO RESPOND BACK TO US WITH THE PAYMENT THEN, WE WOULD FIRST SEND A LETTER TO THE MAYOR OF THE CITY WHERE YOU RESIDE AND DIRECT THEM TO CLOSE YOUR BANK ACCOUNT UNTIL YOU HAVE BEEN JAILED AND ALL YOUR PROPERTIES WILL BE CONFISCATED BY THE FBI. WE WOULD ALSO SEND A LETTER TO THE COMPANY/AGENCY THAT YOU ARE WORKING FOR SO THAT THEY COULD GET YOU FIRED UNTIL WE ARE THROUGH WITH OUR INVESTIGATIONS BECAUSE A SUSPECT IS NOT SUPPOSE TO BE WORKING FOR THE GOVERNMENT OR ANY PRIVATE ORGANIZATION.
YOUR ID WHICH WE HAVE IN OUR DATABASE BEEN SENT TO ALL THE CRIMES AGENCIES IN AMERICA FOR THEM TO INSET YOU IN THEIR WEBSITE AS AN INTERNET FRAUDSTERS AND TO WARN PEOPLE FROM HAVING ANY DEALS WITH YOU. THIS WOULD HAVE BEEN SOLVED ALL THIS WHILE IF YOU HAD GOTTEN THE CERTIFICATE SIGNED, ENDORSED AND STAMPED AS YOU WHERE INSTRUCTED IN THE E-MAIL BELOW.THIS IS THE FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION (FBI) AM WRITING IN RESPONSE TO THE E-MAIL YOU SENT TO US AND AM USING THIS MEDIUM TO INFORM YOU THAT THERE IS NO MORE TIME LEFT TO WASTE BECAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN GIVEN FROM THE 3RD OF JANUARY. AS STATED EARLIER TO HAVE THE DOCUMENT ENDORSED, SIGNED AND STAMPED WITHOUT FAILURE AND YOU MUST ADHERE TO THIS DIRECTIVES TO AVOID YOU BLAMING YOURSELF AT LAST WHEN WE MUST HAVE ARRESTED AND JAILED YOU FOR LIFE AND ALL YOUR PROPERTIES CONFISCATED.
YOU FAILED TO COMPLY WITH OUR DIRECTIVES AND THAT WAS THE REASON WHY WE DIDN'T HEAR FROM YOU ON THE 3RD AS OUR DIRECTOR HAS ALREADY BEEN NOTIFIED ABOUT YOU GET THE PROCESS COMPLETED YESTERDAY AND RIGHT NOW THE WARRANT OF ARREST HAS BEEN SIGNED AGAINST YOU AND IT WILL BE CARRIED OUT IN THE NEXT 48HOURS AS STRICTLY SIGNED BY THE FBI DIRECTOR. WE HAVE INVESTIGATED AND FOUND OUT THAT YOU DIDN'T HAVE ANY IDEA WHEN THE FRAUDULENT DEAL WAS COMMITTED WITH YOUR INFORMATION'S/IDENTITY AND RIGHT NOW IF YOU ID IS PLACED ON OUR WEBSITE AS A WANTED PERSON, I BELIEVE YOU KNOW THAT IT WILL BE A SHAME TO YOU AND YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY BECAUSE AFTER THEN IT WILL BE ANNOUNCE IN ALL THE LOCAL CHANNELS THAT YOU ARE WANTED BY THE FBI.
AS A GOOD CHRISTIAN AND A HONEST MAN, I DECIDED TO SEE HOW I COULD BE OF HELP TO YOU BECAUSE I WOULD NOT BE HAPPY TO SEE YOU END UP IN JAIL AND ALL YOUR PROPERTIES CONFISCATED ALL BECAUSE YOUR INFORMATION'S WAS USED TO CARRY OUT A FRAUDULENT TRANSACTIONS, I CALLED THE EFCC AND THEY DIRECTED ME TO A PRIVATE ATTORNEY WHO COULD HELP YOU GET THE PROCESS DONE AND HE STATED THAT HE WILL ENDORSE, SIGN AND STAMP THE DOCUMENT AT THE SUM OF $499 USD ONLY AND I BELIEVE THIS PROCESS IS CHEAPER FOR YOU. YOU NEED TO DO EVERYTHING POSSIBLE WITHIN TODAY AND TOMORROW TO GET THIS PROCESS DONE BECAUSE OUR DIRECTOR HAS CALLED TO INFORM ME THAT THE WARRANT OF ARREST HAS BEEN SIGNED AGAINST YOU AND ONCE IT HAS BEEN APPROVED, THEN THE ARREST WILL BE CARRIED OUT, AND FROM OUR INVESTIGATIONS WE LEARNT THAT YOU WERE THE PERSON THAT FORWARDED YOUR IDENTITY TO ONE IMPOSTOR/FRAUDSTERS IN NIGERIA LAST YEAR WHEN HE HAD A DEAL WITH YOU ABOUT THE TRANSFER OF SOME ILLEGAL FUNDS INTO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT WHICH IS VALUED AT THE SUM OF $10.500,000.00 USD.
I PLEADED ON YOUR BEHALF SO THAT THIS AGENCY COULD GIVE YOU THE 2011/04/29 SO THAT YOU COULD GET THIS PROCESS DONE BECAUSE I LEARNT THAT YOU WERE SENT SEVERAL E-MAIL WITHOUT GETTING A RESPONSE FROM YOU, PLEASE BEAR IT IN MIND THAT THIS IS THE ONLY WAY THAT I CAN BE ABLE TO HELP YOU AT THIS MOMENT OR YOU WOULD HAVE TO FACE THE LAW AND ITS CONSEQUENCES ONCE IT HAS BEFALL ON YOU.YOU WOULD MAKE THE PAYMENT THROUGH MONEY GRAM TRANSFER OR WESTERN UNION MONEY TRANSFER WITH THE BELOW DETAILS.
RECEIVER NAME == PAUL UBA
COUNTRY==== NIGERIA
CITY===== LAGOS
TEXT QUESTION==== WHEN
TEXT ANSWER== TODAY TODAY
AMOUNT===$499USD
SENDERS NAME==MICKY MOUSE
SEND THE PAYMENT DETAILS TO ME WHICH ARE SENDERS NAME AND ADDRESS, MTCN NUMBER, TEXT QUESTION AND ANSWER USED AND THE AMOUNT SENT. MAKE SURE THAT YOU DIDN'T HESITATE MAKING THE PAYMENT DOWN TO THE AGENCY BY TODAY SO THAT THEY COULD HAVE THE CERTIFICATE ENDORSED, SIGNED AND STAMPED IMMEDIATELY WITHOUT ANY FURTHER DELAY. AFTER ALL THIS PROCESS HAS BEEN CARRIED OUT, THEN WE WOULD HAVE TO PROCEED TO THE BANK FOR THE TRANSFER OF YOUR COMPENSATION FUNDS WHICH IS VALUED AT THE SUM OF $10,500,000.00 USD WHICH WAS SUPPOSE TO HAVE BEEN TRANSFERRED TO YOU ALL THIS WHILE.
NOTE/ ALL THE CRIMES AGENCIES HAS BEEN CONTACTED ON THIS REGARDS AND WE SHALL TRACE AND ARREST YOU IF YOU DISREGARD THIS INSTRUCTIONS. You are given a grace TODAY to make the payment for the document after which your failure to do that will attract a maximum arrest and finally you will be appearing in court for act of terrorism, money laundering and drug trafficking charges, so be warned not to try any thing funny because you are been watched.
THANKS AS I WAIT FOR YOUR RESPONSE
RESPECTIVELY
AGENT RONALD T. HOSKO.
FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION (FBI)
:rolleyes:. Don't hold your breath Paul! (or is it Ronald? :whistle:)
You have to be kidding, who would send that junk?
You would think that they would get someone to check the grammar first… :faint:
Originally posted by darkesthour:
The same gits that keep telling me to update my details with the hundred and fifty banks I apparently have accounts with! :p.
wow, I had no idea the FBI wrote in ALL CAPS ALL THE TIME. How rude. And my, talk about run on sentences! π ever hear of punctuation? :p
Originally posted by darkesthour:
The grammar is excellent for a spammer! :lol:.
But that's sent by Mickey, a good friend with Seamus, so it must be a very very official letter :p
hahaha….i before e except after c. It's not from the FBI – that is in fact a spelling mistake. It's from the FIB – Federation of International Beanheads :up:.
Wow, the FBI contacts people in broken english now? How considerate of them to make us all laugh.
FBI as Female Body Investigator? :left::jester:
I hear you can get a Master's Degree in spamming at the University of Nigeria.
He's copy and pasted several spam letters together to make his own sound more threatening, and hasn't changed the details on some of them. π
Only if you send Β£500 to the following address…
:p. Sent from a Windows Live email address but 'reply to' address is some obscure news site in Czech. :rolleyes:.
"I HOPE YOUβRE UNDERSTAND"
That 'Letter' form University of Nigeria would come in real handy.HOLDER OF THIS CETIFIKATE HAS RIGHT TO CALL HERSELF/HIMSELF SOLICITOR (INHERITANCE ACT CLAIMS), BACHELOR OF SURGERY (PHALLOPLASTY), FEDERAL LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICER, ETC.HOLDER HAS TOOK CLASSES INDESIGN OF FAKE CHEQUESUNTREACABLE AND IRREVERSIBLE MONEY TRANSFERE-MAIL HIGHJACKINGLOTTERY SCAMCHARITY SCAMSMS SCAMMINGHAS ALSO SPECILIZED INBAD ENGLISHFAKE WEBSIDESCOUNTERFEIT CHECK CASHINGYOURS TRUELYSONJA PAMELA MONROEHEAD OF INTERNATIONAL SCAMMERS ORGANISATION, NIGERIA
Desperate Dumbness π
:lol:.:idea:. Let's start our own, online Spammer's course! :devil:.
Originally posted by qlue:
As you seem to get a wider variety of Spam than me will you be the teacher? π
Hmmmm, never realized our American FBI agents were so grammatically challenged—I'll have to talk to my niece sternly about that. Apparently she being a graduate of Texas A&M is not the reason she was hired by the FBI. I'll ask her to suggest they give a course in English to all their agents before they are allowed to send spam emails.
Originally posted by harrytheman:
I may be over qualified for the job! :lol:.Originally posted by L2D2:
They might not appreciate the suggestion though! :p.
No, they would Rateliate π
I suspect that you are right π
baaaa, baaaad :cow: (that's a sheep in disguise. No sheep smiley. )
Sheep are in short supply these days :awww:
And that's a good thing DH. π :p
Most of them are shorter than me π
They are still around :yes:
I expect they will be as long as you are. π
Think they might retaliate?
pun, pun!
Originally posted by darkesthour:
They're all in Facebook being thrown around! :whistle:.
Lots of people that used to farm sheep here now farm dairy instead, interestingly the number of cows and the cost of dairy products have been increasing ever since
Shows how little I visit FB—haven't had any sheep thrown at me
π π π
π π π
I like how those spammers make their letters look like obvious spam letters…
Yeah, it makes it so easy for Google's spam filters to spot! :p.
π How come he only wants $499USD? Does he think that banks do not check everything under $500USD?:doh:
SO YOU GOT HIM DID YOU?? :p
lol
Originally posted by serola:
Woah, nothin' to do with me. :angel: